I remember Monday

I remember...going to the hospital the morning before you were born, to be induced. I didn't get a wink of sleep the night before I was induced because I was so nervous. Every woman thinks about her labor day and what it will be like, how it will feel and is nervous of the unknown. By the time we got to the hospital that morning, I had to sit down before we made it to labor and delivery just to catch my breath and try to calm myself down.

Once I was in labor, though, I didn't have time to be nervous. Daddy was amazing, as always, and seemed to know exactly what I needed. Whether it be ice chips, music, more hot water in the bath, a cool washcloth on my forehead. He was awesome throughout the whole process and I certainly couldn't have done it without him.

When you were about ready to be born, my doctor asked me if I wanted to reach down and deliver you. It wasn't anything she and I had talked about before I went into labor, so I was so surprised and excited...I reached down and pulled you out and onto my chest, which to this day was the single best moment of my life. Daddy and I both remember vividly that the second you were born and placed on my chest, you turned your head and looked up at each of us....you were meeting us for the first time, as we were meeting you. I will never forget that.

I forgot to even ask the doctor what the sex was, until I heard her shout, "It's a girl!" and I burst into tears all over again. It was at that moment that I let myself realize how much I wanted a little girl throughout my pregnancy.

The time shortly after you were born is a blur, as they cleaned you up and helped me with my recovery. You were born in the middle of the night, and the lights were off, besides the ones hanging over your little bassinet and the light they used to see while I was in labor. I remember thinking how peaceful everything was - it was dark and cozy, and just very, very surreal. I also remember thinking that I never knew how much I needed you until you were born....I love you, Cadi...